Meeting with foster carer - post adoption

by - March 11, 2018

During the adoption process it’s drummed in time after time how important a child’s attachment is to both the foster carer and the new adoptive parents.
I remember the moment i met my little boy and being concerned how long it’ll take for him to attach to me. It’s so important to have a healthy attachment and something alot of birth parents/ biological parents may take for granted as your baby has known no other than you.

Imagine being a little 6 month old living with a person who cares for all your needs then one day you’re taken away and put with strangers, strange smells, strange routine and strange people.

When my little boy moved in, he was amazing and took everything in his stride. He appears to have made a strong healthy attachment so much so, all authorities were happy for him to spend his first night out at grandmas within 6 weeks.

When adopting a child its generally recommended that you don’t meet foster carers for at least 6 months after a child is placed.
As Christmas was fast approaching and with my boys attachment going strong, i felt it would be a good opportunity for Rhys to meet with his foster carer!

I was fairly anxious about how my boy will react. Will he be puzzled? Will he be confused? Will he regress and disengage his attachment with me!

After getting the all clear from the relevant authorities we agreed to meet foster carer on 23rd December!

We decided to meet the foster carer at a coffee shop in the hope to minimise confusion. When we saw the foster carer....Rhys wasn’t remotely interested and acted the way he does around everyone and proved that his attachment is firmly on me and Michael

The worries i had were for nothing and when we got home Rhys was his usual, normal, happy, smiley self.

We plan to meet the foster carer again in March.

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